Body positivity sucks: Why I only find shopping so frustrating these days

Body positivity fucked up
Why I now only find shopping frustrating

© Joos Mind / Getty Images

I love shopping more than anything! In fact, I’m actually the one who drives to the completely overcrowded city center full of anticipation on Saturdays, digs through Sale mountains and stands in line for hours in front of the changing rooms. But just thinking about shopping makes me throw up.

I used to save my pocket money for weeks to treat myself to a day of shopping with friends or my mum. The yield was mostly moderate. You know it: If you’re really looking for something, you won’t find exactly this part anywhere. Despite this, my enthusiasm for shopping did not diminish. It even increased when I managed to lose 50 pounds and finally fit into even more clothes from the current collections. But that’s exactly what I see as the problem now.

Ten horses won’t get me into town anymore

Downtown used to give me everything I could dream of in a weekend. The shops open at 10 a.m., we have until 8 p.m. – let’s fight! A little pizza break in between (I wasn’t interested in coffee at that time), and then we continued to hunt for bargains and new trendy items. Along with hundreds of others. This euphoria evaporated in the dressing room at the latest. Honestly, what’s with this horrible light? Of course, it should get customers to try things on quickly and take them home immediately. For me, changing clothes does the complete opposite. If I see every little dent on my body and then don’t even get my regular size over my thighs, at some point I just sit there frustrated and end up not buying anything extra because I just don’t feel like it anymore. And I don’t even want to start with my mood for the rest of the business. I’m actually pretty much at peace with my body. So shopping day failed, maybe I’ll give the free shipping another chance?

Attempt number 2

I have always found online shopping incredibly annoying. First I look for parts, then I forget about them again until the shopping cart is empty. And when an order has finally been sent, you have to wait. I would like to have the new clothes right away and would wear them tonight. Anyway, at least then I can try everything on relaxed in front of my own mirror and the light is more flattering too. So: Order is out, anticipation is rising. Then the disappointment follows. Just a few weeks ago I received such a large package that the delivery person had great difficulty maneuvering it up to the third floor. It just barely fit through my apartment door. So there I sat. On a huge package, from which only two pieces fit and I like them, because of course I had to order everything in three different sizes. And how do I get the package down and away again? Do you understand what i mean? Exhausting and annoying.

Who the hell is going to fit in there?

Body positivity or at least body acceptance has now arrived in society. More and more fashion labels rely on different body types, skin colors and diversity. And I think that’s great! Unfortunately, things still look different for many retailers in the pedestrian zone and in online shops. And I don’t really know where to start. Maybe the sizes. I have a pretty straight build. Not particularly slim, not plus-size. I’m the classic undefined middle that doesn’t fit into any category. I usually go for size 38 or 40. And so far I’ve always gotten in there. Either the jeans and shirts have all shrunk or I’ve just opened up. In any case, I hardly fit into a size 38, and even a 40 is just about right. And that’s how many women around me feel. Sizes change overnight, even though our bodies don’t change. A 40 is felt to be getting smaller and trends can only be worn by those whose body shape is currently in fashion. A few years ago it was still skinny jeans that flattered curvier women in particular, now oversized is the hot shit, but it doesn’t fit everyone either. And if someone tells me again that Heroine chic is back, I’ll jump out the window. I want trends that suit us all. Fitting rooms with beautiful light, in which you can look at each other and celebrate new, matching pieces. More diversity, which is not only good for the image, but also gives the customer a great body feeling. Thanks! And until then, I’d rather wear parts I already have than triggering my frustration potential.


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Deborah Acker

I write epic fantasy; self-published via KDP. Devoted dog mom to my 10 yr old GSD, Shadow! DM not a priority; slow response at best #amwriting #author.

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